xoxo, the chapmans: dear 2012,

a month of your sista-friend 2013 has already come and gone, and i’ve been to cray cray to even say goodbye. from letters past, you know how much i hate goodbyes- so please don’t take it personal… but, hey, it’s better late than never.

you were a collection of some of the happiest memories and the most challenging moments of my life – and so, i’d like to take a minute to reminisce and thank you for it all, because you changed me, just like you years always seem to do.

you were the year that Alice changed from a baby to a toddler. she turned from mild to spicy, and calm to rambunctious, and sweet to sweeter. you saw her form opinions of colors she liked (and didn't like), clothes she wanted to wear (and didn't want to wear) and things she wanted to do (and refused to do). basically, you gave her her terrible twos. thanks a lot, jerk. you were there as she started jabbering and talking in the cutest voice i’ve ever heard – dancing the cutest twirls i’ve ever seen, and making us laugh non-stop with all her funny, quirky lil mannerisms.

you were the year that Ellie turned from a lil toddler into a big kid. you gave her a year full of activities – from swimming lessons, to gymnastics, to ballet, taekwondo. You helped her prove that she is brave and will try anything. I love that about her. she ended joy school and started Preschool – a place that she proclaims ‘is better than Disneyland!’ she loves Mrs. Perona best these days – and i honestly feel immensely blessed that she has had such a wonderful first experience with school. Ellie seems so old now- you made her that way. she is the boss of the house, but she also is the nurturer of the house – and I adore her sweet, big heart more than anything.

you were the year where my little girls became friends. together, we watched them fight, play, share, kiss, hug, yell, hit, say sorry, and love on each other some more. and i know it was a gathering of all of these emotions and moments that you gave them that has led them to proudly declare “you are my bestest friend in the whole wide world, Alice!” and, “you’re my bestest fwiend, too Eh-yee.” and my heart melts into a muddled pile on the floor. so, thank you for giving me one of my very favorite things in my life to date – two little girls who love each other.

you were the first full year that M was in a new career. what a crazy ride it has been! we have had our insane moments, but all in all, it has been a fantastic change for our family – especially now that things have become more settled. we loved not having to share him with busy season for the first time ever!, and just love having our daddy home more. what a blessing to be in a career path that you love!

you were the year that gave us 52 free meal vouchers to chick-fil-a! fat n' happy, is what we call it around here. and boy are we happy about it.

you were the year that we made it down to Southern California 6 times! we loved taking advantage of living a quick road-trip away to be able to spend so much time with my family…and of course the added excuse to play at the beach, and to get to use our annual passes to both Disneyland and Sea World. we especially loved our February trip – where we visited Disneyland 5 times that trip! it was truly magical, as it always is-- even though somehow it got left undocumented! and so, here are a plethora of snapshots to hopefully make up for it.

you were the year that we enjoyed the Mexican coast with M’s family. ohhhhhhh, Mexico! (sung like James Taylor). you gave us jogs on the beach, glorious sunsets, toes in the sand, giggly little girls, and time together. thank you for giving us such a happy trip full of happy times.

you were the year that i learned so much about callings and service in the church, as i hit my one-year mark serving as Primary President in my ward. you gave me so many opportunities to see children through God’s eyes, and i treasure those moments. you also put so many remarkable people in my path, whom i have grown to admire and aspire to be like. you taught me to love Primary with all my heart – and i will always remember you for that.

you were the year that Ellie became a sunbeam – and what a blessing you gave me to be there to watch her soak up all the wonderful things primary has to offer children and families, including singing at ward parties and church meetings, participating in her first primary program, and most importantly, learning about our savior, Jesus Christ. you were the year that Alice suddenly grew up and went into nursery – and i could finally enjoy church again!

you were the year that taught me about true friendship. we enjoyed many morning runs together, lunches at the park, afternoons by the pool, zumba classes, baby showers, happy reunions with old friends, welcoming new babies, family dinners, birthdays & girls nights. you reaffirmed to me the importance of surrounding ourselves with good, kind people who make you feel good about yourself, make you laugh, and make you want to be better to others. thank you for blessing my life (& my girls' lives) with good friends.

you were the year where M and i celebrated 7 years of mawwaige together. he’s still the nicest guy i've ever met, and i wonder all the time how i tricked him into marrying a cray cray like me.

you were the year my baby sister found her love. you were the year that she became the most beautiful bride i’ve ever seen, and she joined the married club with the coolest guy ever. you helped my family gather from all corners of the globe to be a part of her joining the married club -- you gave me time with the people i love most, and i love you for that.

you were the year that gave us the crazy news that we would be outnumbered forever, as baby #3 was on its way. we were excited, scared, nervous, happy, and all around overwhelmed. we still feel that way.

you were the year that told us our baby was a boy! we were (and still are) so stoked to add some cars and trains to this joint…and get rid of some of this princess crap!

you were the year that gave us the unfortunate news about our baby boy’s growth and development. i’ll never forget how i felt in that moment, receiving that news. i don’t think i’ve ever experienced so much sorrow and pain, and yet simultaneously, so much peace and comfort. that moment changed me forever.

you were the year that ended with a roller-coaster of emotions – from feeling invincible, like i can and will do anything, to feeling powerless and helpless – like i can do nothing. and i’m grateful for all of the emotions. because you were the year that has taught me the most about humanity. about trials and triumphs. about realizing that no one is problem-free – and everyone is carrying something, most often silently. you taught me to see the goodness in people -- that so many are kind and loving and willing to go to the moon and back for you. you taught me to pray. harder than i've ever prayed. you helped me feel comfort. in times when comfort seemed untouchable. you taught me about God's love. that sometimes you dont' even know what you need, and someone is there offering a spontaneous dinner at your door, a hug and a shoulder to cry on. you taught me it's ok to be sad, that some things are just plain sad. you taught me to be more sensitive and compassionate. you taught me to never turn away from my faith -- because it's far too helpless that way. and while sometimes i’m mad at you for causing me so much pain, i wouldn’t ask you to take it back -- because the lessons i’ve learned through it are invaluable to me, and have truly shaped me, and continue to shape me into who i am today. and i hope that person is better than i used to be.

and so, 2012, i love you. thanks for the ups and downs. thanks for changing me. thanks for so many wonderful moments. thank you, especially for all the moments i've been able to cherish with these three loves. they are my world -- and more than anything else, you've shown me that.