Thursday, February 3, 2011

life's treasures.

Ellie's greatest treasures these days are these little princesses.

now she got them last year for Christmas. as in some 400 days ago. but we recently added Ariel to the collection. and now they are all inseparable from each other and from her.
they take baths with Ellie.
they watch movies with Ellie.
they watch Ellie eat her breakfast.
they run errands with us.
she makes sure they are clean- if they have an ounce of dirt on them, she asks for a wipe so she can wipe them right up.
they go on bike-rides with Ellie (hence the picture- she sticks them in the little basket behind...and intermittently checks on them throughout her ride.)
they even get sung to sleep with Ellie. until i finally convince Ellie that we have a strict "no toys in the crib" policy, and she finally gives in to letting go of them. and then they watch her sleep.
but don't you worry, they are the first thing she asks for when she wakes up.
she loves those things. sooo much. her little princess treasures.

today we had a very rough morning.
don't let this adorable face deceive you.

and if i'm being honest, i don't really want to get into it.
just know that tears were involved, rushing out of Costco without any of my groceries happened, and i was angry.
i hate getting angry.
do you get angry?
in my head, i imagine all moms being so level-headed and i feel so bad for Ellie that she doesn't have one of you level-headed people for a mom instead of me...because she gets me to a point of frustration that i didn't even know existed within myself.
and then finally i come back down to my normal, less steamy version of myself.
and i find myself crying on the couch.
while she cries in her room in a time-out because i don't know what else to do.
is this really working? i think to myself.
and finally i go in there, and wrap my arms around her and tell her that i love her.
and i feel better.
and i know she feels better too.

and then, while i'm sitting there rocking her on that rocking chair just like i did when she was a little baby, i think to myself, my girls are my greatest treasures.
i watch them take their baths.
i watch movies with them.
i eat breakfast with them.
we run errands together.
i make sure they are clean- a wipe can fix just about any messy mouth, hand, or...well, you get the idea.
we go on bike rides together.
and then i sing them to sleep.
they are the last thing i think about before i fall asleep.
and then they are the first thing i wonder about when i wake up.
they are my treasures.

watching Ellie love and care for her little treasures as much as she does has reminded me to love and care for my little treasures a little better.
children really are our greatest teachers, aren't they?



The Hurst Family said...

I felt angry for at least 8 years while my children were little. There was a lot of going in and hugging and saying I love you. Much repenting on my part. You've got it right. They are your greatest treasures and I SWEAR to you, it will be worth it. I am so glad I went through it all with them and now I'm rarely angry. Just incredibly PROUD. Hang in there girl. You're doing GREAT!

Alesa said...

This made me cry. Which means you're a great mom. My niece has a set of princess that go everwhere with her too. Her mom is documenting it for a scrapbook.

Ashley said...

Ditto on the crying. You always make me weepy. I hope I'm a mom like you someday. Love you muchly.

Megan said...

I totally lost it with Sol this morning only because I was stressed and he was being difficult. We were in a hurry and I snapped at him. I immediatly had one of those out of body experiences where I was watching myself be this grouchy mean mom and felt terrible. And then Sol says "I"m sorry mommy," and then "It's okay" cause he always tells himself that. Then I told him I was really sorry and that I would try to be nicer. He said "Its okay mommy, some times we're naughty." Gosh. He's so quick to forgive. I love that little guy. We're not perfect. We do our best. And lucky for us we have such amazing treasures that love us no matter what.

Jana and Christopher said...

Thanks for the perfect words.

Kris said...

Completely. Don't you ever think that you're not the only non-level-headed mom out there. :-)
In fact... these days I have said so many times right before putting Logan down to nap time, "I'm sorry I yelled at you today, sweetie," that Logan now prompts me everyday... "Mom, this is where you say to me, 'I'm sorry for yelling at you' ". Talk about awful.
And you're right, the lessons we learn from children are priceless. Logan is always so quick to forgive it makes me feel even worse. :-)