Monday, August 24, 2009
an emotional geyser
tonight, i'm feeling emotionally geysered.
what does that mean exactly, you ask?
well, a geyser is basically like an explosion. all this pressure builds up under the earth, and then all of a sudden, WABAM! it explodes. and if you're a cool enough explosion, people gather from all over the world and take pictures by you and name you a dog's name like "old faithful."
tonight is my last night here in utah.
and thus the explanation for my geyser-ing.
i think i've been unusually strong amidst this huge change.
but tonight, i just want to be a little girl, curled up in my mom and dad's bed, and for them to go get that loved-to-death (literally) blanket of mine and tell me everything is going to be alright.
instead, i get to be the grown-up, offering a blankie (and a very adorable little pig) to my little girl to tell her that everything is going to be alright...even though deep down, can i really be so sure?
but i have to say this:
i am sure.
while i am sad, and dramatically tearful at this moment, i am at peace. because exactly one year ago, my sweet hubby and i had the most peaceful of experiences as we both knew with overwhelming certainty that California was where our little family needed to be at this time.
and so that's where we will go.
and so, brave i will be. because my baby needs me to be. because my hubby needs me to be. because i need me to be.
and there's not much more to say tonight than that.