Thursday, August 2, 2007


so i decided, i'm ditchin the wordpress blog. I'm going to record everything right here. so, i'm just going to put some snips from the blog that i would like to remember.

on no particular day somewhere in january of 2007, i wrote:

"i’ve decided that life is pretty funny. it is eventful. it is uneventful. it is happy. at times it is unhappy. i like life, though. i mean, me and life, we like to dance together. we like to cry together. me and life, we’re pretty tight. i don’t go anywhere without it, even though sometimes it goes places without me. i guess life is a typical friend.

lately, i’ve said to life, hey, life, what are we going to do together? i mean, we have some big twists and turns coming up. but life is just being a listener right now. life hasn’t said much to me lately… i value that life is such a good listener. but sometimes, i need feedback. kind of like the feedback that simon gives to the crappy singers by telling them they probably don’t have a future in what they think they have a future in. i need life to be a simon for me right now. but life isn’t a simon for me. it’s just life.

i have to admit, i’m scared for some of the big changes that await me in the near future. life knows that i’m afraid. but life doesn’t change the changes. life thinks that changes are good. life always brings on changes. what is it with life? but it’s ok. i would be so boring with out life and the changes it embraces. life makes me daring."

it's funny how life goes in rounds because my heart today echoes what it did that day somewhere in january.

on some whim in the mundane of november 2006, i reminisced with a romantic heart:

"i think that one of my favorite things is just staying in on a friday night with the one i love and nuzzling together to watch a movie, while eating some of my favorite popcorn made from a my favorite birthday present, the whirly popper. i love how your mind just kind of gets transported to this other world when you’re watching a movie or a favorite show. its like, you feel like you know the people. you feel like you’re there. its hard to imagine sometimes that these people don’t actually know you in return, but they don’t. i love nuzzling with my favorite pink blanket that i have had since infancy; my hubby thinks i’m crazy that i love that silky thing–but it smells so nice. it smells like a bikeride on my favorite purple bike- the one i got for christmas that had different speed options. it smells like the bars in the gym i used to work out on when i was a gymnast. it smells like cotton candy, my favorite treat, that we always used to get at the orange county fair, or the baseball games, or the park on the fourth of july. friday nights are my favorite because i get to be a kid again and forget about all the worries of the world."

my favorite things all have a smell. i'm grateful for my nose.

in the same november of 2006, i must have had a horrible bathroom experience. I wrote:

"i really really hate going to the bathroom. sometimes i wonder why the man upstairs made us go through this interesting process. i mean, don’t get me wrong; i appreciate the fact that we don’t have to keep everything inside that we consume (that would be weird). but i’ve found that i always wait until the very last minute, till i can’t hold it any more. and when i go, it takes me about 15 seconds to get in there and out of there. i’ve been known to be the fastest “goer” of my kind. i think its partially because i always have to go in the most horrible of places. i.e. school. the school loos are the worst. i mean, seriously, how difficult can it be for the school to replace a toilet? instead they let them get so bad, that you can’t tell whether the brown stuff is rust or something else… i always hope its rust."

everyone has their least favorite things, right?

finally, my last favorite blog from wordpress was when i wrote about screaming. i've always had a bit of a temper, i guess:

"sometimes i want to scream so loud so that everyone on the planet will have to turn around, stop what they are doing, and acknowledge the fact that i am screaming. there doesn’t even have to be a good reason for the scream–though sometimes there is. let’s face it, life gets dicey sometimes. but most of the time, i just walk around campus thinking, i wonder if i screamed really really loud, what would everyone do? i imagine most people would just keep walking. but some would stop. and when they stopped, i would say, listen, everything’s ok, i just wanted to scream. but since this is probably a socially unacceptable act, i will have to stick with the remedy of the car wash. no one can hear you scream in there."

there's a peak into what had potential to be great...but was absorbed by the better

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