holga: M's birthday.

last night Alice was up all night.
she's been doing that lately. waking up, and then not going back to sleep.
M takes a turn for a while, but then she just cries and cries for Mama, so i get my lazy butt out of bed and take on the irreplaceable role as Mama, even though i can't stop thinking about my pillow and the dream about sprinkles cupcakes i was just having.
something about being up with a kid who normally sleeps through the night makes me very cranky between the hours of 1 - 4 am. "what is wrong with you!?" often fires through my brain. and "why can't M get his lazy butt out of bed and help?" even though he had just been up with her too. what can i say, i'm not my most rational self in the middle of the night.
so i found myself a pillow and blanket and laid by Alice's crib. i sung to her for a good hour and then got too tired. after that every 5 minutes she'd desperately call, "Mama!?" and i'd say, "i'm right here." and she'd settle back in and try to fall asleep.
it made me sad to think i was mad at her. i mean i don't think she wants to be up in the middle of the night, either. who knows what's going on in that little body.
by about 7 am, i heard some snoring from her crib and we both slept for about an hour, when Ellie found me on the floor and excitedly body slammed me. we all crawled in her bed and i just wanted to be asleep the rest of the day.
that's when my hero steps in.
he told me, i'm taking them for the day. you get some sleep and i'll see you later.

what a guy, i tell you.
my hero really.
that seemingly small gesture means the world to me today.

and while i love my little family- and all the fun we have together (like on that sunny beach day of his birthday), my guy knows when i just need a day off from it all.

so glad i get to keep him forever and ever.

xoxo