early retirement...

it's 6:48 am...getting ready for my last day of kindergarten...i'm mid-sentence, and already in mid-breakdown.

can you blame me? look how stinken cute those kiddos are.

but then again, from now on, i get to devote myself 100% to this cute kiddo:

so today, teacher-marci is very sad....but mommy-marci is very, very happy. 

talk about moody, huh?

housekeeping..

i have a few housekeeping items: (most of which have to do with movies or television, so if you're less shallow than me, maybe you don't want to read this post?? if this is the case, please don't tell me so i don't feel horribly bad about myself. thanks.)

1. if you like to be depressed and feel horribly sad, watch the movie, Nights in Rodanthe. you will cry. and you will probably really hate it. so i guess this is my backwards way of saying, DO NOT WATCH THIS MOVIE. it's very bleak.

2. honk twice if you were shocked (pleasantly, of course) that KRIS won american idol!? wow wow wow.

3. honk three times if you are STOKED that So You Think You Can Dance has finally started!

4. is it just me, or have there been some extremely dramatic finishes to this season's shows? 24, LOST, House, AI (but we established that one already), the Office....the list could really go on and on, couldn't it? if you'd like to chat about it, (and you know i would) leave a comment.

5. Seven Pounds is probably the strangest movie i have ever seen. have you seen it?

6. it's a long weekend! (woot woot!) and then only 4 days left of school!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! would you be surprised if i have an emotional break-down the last day of school? sadness and happiness are going to be simultaneously geyser-ing out of my body. it's going to be weird. watch out.

7. and just because i can't make a post without mentioning my Ellie, guess who took 6 steps today? we almost have a walker on our hands.............get ready.

eleven

11 is my favorite number.
have i ever told you that?

i don't really know why it's my favorite number...but it always has been.
i think i like how it's the only number that is parallel...constant..symmetrical. i like how it looks like a road. and so, 11, is my favorite-little-number-road.

and ellie turned 11-little-road-months-old this month. just one month till she's a year.
does that mean she's not a baby anymore after that? that's what i always thought. but now that it's here, i don't feel like she's not my baby anymore. she still IS my baby.

here's 11 recent pictures of my 11 month old ellie for you to see for yourself. she's a baby, right? oh, and she's cute.
i love her.










xoxo

here comes the bride...

something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue...

seems to be my mantra the last few weeks. people all around me tyin' the knot...wearin' white...bein' all kissy kissy and happily ever after.

it started with receiving like a dozen wedding announcements in the mail. whoa. i thought everyone i knew was married. apparently..not? it's been fun to see all the classy, unique styles of today's hip & chic brides.

wedding fever continued with watching Bride Wars. have you seen it? i'm not gonna lie...i LOVED it! there were so many parts that i laughed. out loud. not many movies can make me do that. i loved the part where Kate Hudson's hair gets turned blue. classic. maybe it was the mood i was in? don't know. but if you're in need of a giggle or two...rent it, watch it, love it.

then i had the awesome opportunity of attending the wedding of my sweet friend, Meredith. we've known each other since we were all pimply faced...and we cheered for rival junior highs. really. (do rival junior highs exist? apparently they do. this was big stuff back in '99). then we met and realized that we spoke each other's silly language...and well, it's history from there.


oh man though, can i just say, they were SO in love! so GLOWING. see:


congratulations Mr. & Mrs. Wright. you two are lovely.

and can i just say, what a special thing a temple sealing is! made me want to be a better wife. helped me re-realize how special marriage really is. made me grateful for my sweet groom who chose me almost four years ago.


that night there was a killer party...all carnival themed (with a surprise guest hoola hoop circus lady...very crazy). we danced. we laughed. we caught up with old friends. we photographed.


even E got in on the fun. her idea of fun was more like eating everyone's dropped scraps...and crawling all over the yucky floor. babies can be gross, huh?


finally, i got to teach the YW lesson on covenants and ordinances this past Sunday. once again, i was reminded how sweet it is to have temples on this earth...so that our families can really be together forever. i pulled out my old wedding DVD just for kicks...to watch M & me walking out of the temple, freshly sealed...newlyweds...a new little family unit. and it really takes my breath away to see how glowing we were. i couldn't stop dancing, for heaven sakes! Of course, E wanted to watch too....man, she LOVED watching mama and dada...and at that moment, i just had this overwhelming feeling inside of me....on that day, not so long ago, our little family was born. and even though the hectic day can be filled with newness, oldness, blueness and borrowedness....our wedding days are so special because of that....a new little family is born.

how romantic.

so, if i'm being honest...all this weddingness has made me want to get married all over again. such a special day to remember for the rest of your life, huh?

this one's for the girls

on this mother's day, i'm thinking of all the girls in my life who have made me the person i am today...and more importantly the mother i am today. so, i'd like to say thank you to all my girls out there.

thank you to my sister for being my little sister..and for putting up with my teasing. and for putting up with my mothering instead of sistering. and for loving me. and for being so you and so unique. you were the cutest baby in the whole wide world and i always wanted a baby because of you.


thank you to my sister-in-law, Courtney...for being so sweet to your new little Rosalie. it has made me want to be a better, more patient mommy. thank you to my sister-in-law Carrie- for being so thoughtful and sweet to our little girl even though we are so far apart. you always make me want to be more thoughtful and loving to others.



thank you to my aunts. and to M's aunts. you always have filled in the gaps and filled my life with love and laughter. thank you for making me feel special. thank you for being a part of my life. thank you for loving my feisty baby.


thank you to my girlfriends. my friends from high school who i've been able to watch be mommy's before me...who have paved the way and given me someone to get advice from. my college friends who always encourage me and love me and share these most wonderful of life's events with me. my provo friends- who share it all- from snotty noses, to eating dirt, to walks, to birthday parties, to advice, to yoga, to tv-nights, to dinners and bbq's....thank you for putting up with my flakiness at times and for always inviting me to do things. i love you all for that. to all my other friends- including all of you - who i know from teaching school, other jobs, wards, knowing M, and several other places- thank you for enriching my life and giving me people to look up to and be inspired by (p.s. if you're not pictured below, we need to hang out more. and with our cameras....i was saddened by the fact that i don't have many pictures of all of you, my lovely friends).




thank you to my grandmas (including M's grandmas). you've given me my parents, and M's parents...which are our greatest blessings. thank you for serving us continuously. we wish we could be closer to all of you.



thank you to my cousins. you ladies are LOVELY in every way. i wish we all lived closer to share more of our lives together.


thank you to my mother-in-law for raising such a wonderful man for me to share my life with and be the daddy of my baby girl. thank you for opening your home to me- and your family to me..and making me feel so welcome and loved./


thank you to my mama. for being my best friend. for being so generous. for serving my little family so willingly and lovingly. for laughing and talking with me about every detail of my little life...and for loving me with your biiiggg heart. i love you to the highest mountain.


and thank you to my baby Ellie. thank you for being so sweet...for giving me hugs. for giving me sweet slobbery kisses. for being so excited to see me every morning. for snuggling me. for laughing at my sillyness. and most importantly, for making me a mommy! the happiest mommy in the whole wide world. i love you, lovely sweet Ellie.



happy mother's day!

some fyi's:

fyi: mother's cookies are back. i've never seen M so excited about buying a package of cookies in my entire life.

fyi: teething is a beast. and i hate it. and it never really ends. and did i mention that i hate it?

fyi: spending an afternoon in the garden wearing summer hats and eating flowers (or should i say, watching E eat flowers...and dirt) is absolutely splendid.

fyi: watching pride & prejudice with sisters & mom is the besssssst after a day in the garden.

fyi: not all babies are colicky, much to my distorted perceptions. my niece, little rosalie, is the most peaceful human on the planet.

fyi: mother's day is tomorrow. i'm excited. first mother's day as a real mom. i'm excited to hug my mom extra tight and my ellie extra tight.

fyi: i hate using public restrooms. what is up with the 1-ply toilet paper in there? and really, is it that hard to keep three stalls clean?

fyi: the road 300 W (that the Gateway is on) in SLC has a 30 mph speed limit. we learned that after we received a speeding ticket going 44 yesterday. they were making some serious quotas because we saw someone else pulled over in front of us and someone get pulled over after us. man. why is getting a speeding ticket such a bad feeling?

fyi: johnson & johnson came out with a new bubble bath. ellie LOVES bubbles & bubble baths. what could be better and gentler than a soft bubble bath from j & j? i CANNOT wait to try it.

fyi: only 3 episodes left of 24. it's been in-tense this season.

fyi: watched little mermaid for the bazillionth time today. could still quote every line to every song. and it's still not old. i secretly wish i was ariel.

fyi: i love giveawaytoday.blogspot.com. i just wish i would actually win something for once. sigh.

fyi: i also love anthropologie and ache to be able to afford their clothes. someday. someday.

fyi: i'm nervous to teach in yw tomorrow. weird thing is, i actually do like to teach. but the last couple of lessons have made me really anxious for some reason. i keep telling myself: breathe in, breathe out.

fyi: M and i just ate some delicious frozen yogurt. i talk about frozen yogurt all the time, huh? it's just that good.

fyi: i ran out of fyi's.

multi-tasking, unfinished projects, and countdowns.

the only way i get anything done these days is by multi-tasking.
and i'm not very good at it.
see:



i'm blogging while hanging out with hubby + E, while giving E a bath, while thinking about american idol and how much i hate that Kris had a bad night...
i know.
please tell me you do this too.
anyways.
all this multi-tasking is leading to many unfinished (or procrastinated) projects.
proof:
i just posted a blog post entitled "unfinished projects"... from march. i was going to blog about unfinished projects but never finished it. now that's ironic.

other unfinished projects:

• wedding album (still)

• Kindergarten Books (which need to be finished by Thursday)

• buying a wedding gift for this weekend's wedding of one of my bf's, Mere

• organizing and putting away E's grown-out clothes (i just BARELY took out her 6 months clothes on Sunday. it was very sad. and when i say "i took them out," i mean, i just folded them and put them in a bag in her closet with the rest of her clothes. let's just say her closet is getting pre-tty full.)

• etc, etc, etc. (aka: the list is depressingly long, and i'll just stop there)
  

SO:
i've learned the way to get through hectic times is to live by a countdown. deadlines. makes it all go by...faster?
in fact, remember just under a year ago, living by the ultimate countdown. the countdown to motherhood. whoa. i had a little ticker that said something like "29 days to go." i remember thinking each day, 29 days, i can do this. 28 days, i can do this. little did i know that at 0 days, i couldn't do it anymore and i was still doing it. i'm contradicting myself now with the whole countdown thing. but really, it does keep me sane.

for example:

• 3 days till one of my oldest, sweetest friends gets married. i love weddings. i love things like this to look forward to.
  

• 17 school days left (singing "celebrate good times, COME ON! let's celebrate") which means:
• only 17 days till SUMMER BREAK and EARLY RETIREMENT and being a MOM, 100%.
  

• 1 month till i receive my teaching license- FINALLY!

• 37 days till E turns 1 (what!?)

• 2 months till my favorite holiday, the 4th of July (pow pow! (that's the sound of fireworks))

• 3 1/2 months till we MOVE (sniff, sniff). which means packing. good-byes. heart ache. change. new friendships. packing (i can't help not being overwhelmed by the thought of PACKING...and packing tape. and bubble wrap. and all that jazz.).
  

wow. craziness.

what are you counting down to?? if you're not counting down to anything...i encourage you to find something. it's fun. you'll see. and maybe it will keep you sane. or maybe it will make you even crazier than before.

who knows.

xoxo

wrinkles and peanut butter.

{a picture that has nothing to do with my post...but is included because all posts are better with pictures}

i'm ex-haust-ed.

but i can't sleep.
it could be all that excedrin i took about 6 hours ago. and then that diet sunkist.
caffeine unfortunately affects me.
bad.

so i'm blogging.
it's not often that you'll see me up at 12:10 am.
i'm NOT a night owl.
but i keep thinking.
and thinking.
which leads to my crazy thoughts.
which leads to you hearing my crazy thoughts.
sorry about that.
but i warned you that i think a lot.

so, back to my thoughts.

today, when i got in the car after a long day of teaching, i checked myself in the mirror to look just how haggard i looked (like i always do). much to my horror, i noticed two frightening things:

1. wrinkles under my eyes.
seriously! wrinkles! i even touched them...tried to stretch them out and tighten the skin to make them go away. and they wouldn't. stubborn things. is it just because i'm so tired? i've been so stressed to finish these 4 classes for my licensing...and sleep has been at the bottom of my priority list. is wrinkly skin a price i am willing to pay for my teaching license? no one warned me about this. i mean, i'm only 23. wrinkles at 23!?? (can you tell i am hyperventilating?)

anyways.
i was distracted away from my frightening wrinkles when i noticed the second freaky thing:

2. a big dollop of crusty peanut butter smeared on my left cheek.
(not bum cheek, face cheek...just in case you were confused). yes, there was left-over peanut butter smeared on my face from my PB&J...4 hours prior to that moment. (let's just say, it's been one of those weeks).

i immediately wondered and thought about all the adults i had interacted with that day. i wondered if they had noticed my sloppy face. i wondered what those who noticed thought about me and my peanut butter face.

i then thought about my sweet little kindergartners...and was so grateful for the accepting, happy-go-lucky-ness of five-year olds. it made me think of two things i love so much about these little humans:

1. i love how they don't notice things like peanut-butter faces. they don't see germs. they don't see color. they don't see brand names. they don't judge.

2. i love how even if they did notice my peanut-butter face, they accepted me anyway. they probably related to my peanut-butter face and instead of being horrified for me (like some adults probably were) they probably thought, "i love peanut butter sandwiches! i ate one for lunch too!" i love how they find the best in everything and everyone.

and so tonight,
i'm so grateful for my peanut-butter-face-loving friends.
and while i'm so excited to be 100% mom in four short weeks (insert toe-touch here)
i'll be sad to not be Mrs. Peanut-Butter-Face-Chapman anymore.

change is bittersweet,
isn't it?

xoxo